I Masturbate So I Don’t Get Ball Cancer lyrics

[Verse 1]
Cheeky motherf*cker's got me eating Play-Doh mix
Motherf*cker crams me in like my dad balls deep
Staring at me with ten inches of di*k
Spin 360°, he’s got sick tricks
Man, he never loved me anyway, he calls me “Dipsh*t”
Dowse me in vinegar, I'ma balsamic
Cold cuc*mber, I make the switch
Sentience becomes Pickle Rick

[Pre-Chorus]
What the f*ck, man?
My dad never loved me
I’m so lonely
It’s not a cry for help

[Chorus]
I'm so f*cking lonely, look at me closely
(I'm so f*cking lonely, look at me closely)
Can’t get me horny, can’t find my boney
(Can’t get me horny, can’t find my boney)
I'm so f*cking lonely, look at me closely
(I'm so f*cking lonely, look at me closely)
Can’t get me horny, can’t find my boney
(Can’t get me horny, can’t find my boney)
[Verse 2]
Sick of all these b*tches putting out the rules
Can't put with the motherf*ckers f*cking a tool
Better than the b*tches who f*ck in the schools
Blue’s Clues, motherf*cker, looking for clues
T.V. is my only escape
Or I watch my parents masturbate
As much as ten is better than eight
I’d rather look away

[Pre-Chorus]
What the f*ck, man?
My dad never loved me
I’m so lonely
It’s not a cry for help

[Chorus]
I'm so f*cking lonely, look at me closely
(I'm so f*cking lonely, look at me closely)
Can’t get me horny, can’t find my boney
(Can’t get me horny, can’t find my boney)
I'm so f*cking lonely, look at me closely
(I'm so f*cking lonely, look at me closely)
Can’t get me horny, can’t find my boney
(Can’t get me horny, can’t find my boney)
[Bridge]
f*ck, why can’t I grow?
f*ck, why isn’t there any more?
f*ck, why can’t I grow?
f*ck, my di*k is so f*cking small

[Chorus]
I'm so f*cking lonely, look at me closely
(I'm so f*cking lonely, look at me closely)
Can’t get me horny, can’t find my boney
(Can’t get me horny, can’t find my boney)
I'm so f*cking lonely, look at me closely
(I'm so f*cking lonely, look at me closely)
Can’t get me horny, can’t find my boney
(Can’t get me horny, can’t find my boney)