Brian David Gilbert

"My Autobiography"

Born in the ice storm of ‘94
The youngest of three, but with Moose, that makes four
Mom put me in helmets ‘cause my head was large
I looked like a doofus, but she was in charge

I ate a brick bench, got a scar on my lip
Got equinophobia on a field trip
Sold my soul to a demon to see how I die
I enjoy origami and baking some pie

I went to Hopkins and got a degree
But that does not seem to be helping me
Now I live with my mom ‘cause I cannot get work
I still have to wear helmets ‘cause she is a j*rk

That demon’s still here, but I do not know why
May 6, 2030 is when I will die
The scene of my death is incredibly bleak
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