​first song lyrics

[Intro]
I don't even know anymore, bruh
Jewelryboy

[Verse]
Sitting with my journal on my hand, thinking what to write
Thoughts inside my mind, thinking about going through harder times
I know that these n*ggas laughing at me, but I'm hurt inside
They think that I'm fine, but in reality, I want to die
Why they think I'm antisocial?
Why they think I ain't that loyal?
I think all these n*ggas hurt inside me, my heart starts to boil
Left all of my friends into the dirt, I guess the cookie crumbles
Focused on myself these days, these n*ggas now, they start to fumble
But I ain't really surprised
n*ggas scared to face the truth, but saw within their eyes
I can't stand these n*ggas, especially the ones who lies
You can't trust no one these days, that's reality in life
Who do you believe in?
Who do you seek in?
Who is that one person you wish to be with?
I wish that I had someone who existed
Life ain't no games, you watch out who you speak with
Father, oh father, I'm sorry, forgive me
Mother, oh mother, I'm sorry, I beg thee
Twisted thoughts in my head, they all inside me
I wish these nightmares would get out my body
I'm such an as*h*le, forgive me, I'm sorry
Maybe I shouldn't have friends to begin with
Lies that have came out through my mouth, whats wrong with me?
Maybe I should stop this sh*t and seek therapy
Hiding my face in a mask, because I can't see the real me that lays in my personality