A Ride Home lyrics

by

Zach Braff


EXT. PARKING LOT – DAY TIME [Andrew pulls up in his Depnr next to Sam sitting alone on a bench outside the hospital.]

ANDREW
So why were you really there?

SAM
Charging. I'm a robot.

ANDREW
Do you lie a lot?

SAM
What do you consider a lot?

ANDREW
Enough for people to call you a liar.

SAM
People call me lots of things.

ANDREW
Is one of them "liar"?

SAM
I could say "no," but how would you know I'm not lyin'?

ANDREW
I guess I could choose to trust you.

SAM
You can do that?

ANDREW
I can try.

SAM
Whose bike is that?

ANDREW
It was my grandfather's. It was the only thing he left to anyone in my family, and he left it to me. And I like it.

SAM
So this is the point in the conversation where you ask me if I'd like a ride home.

ANDREW
It is?

SAM
Yep.

ANDREW
Would you like a ride home?

SAM
Fine. But I'm not getting in that sidecar.

ANDREW
Why not?

SAM
Sidecars are for b*tches. Anyone who rides in that is automatically your b*tch. Thus, I will ride on the back. Whoa.

ANDREW
Hold on tight.

SAM
Okay. Holdin'. My hair is blowin' in the wind.

EXT. NJ STREET/MOVING – DAY TIME

ANDREW
What, are you like a hang glider?

SAM
My boyfriend was gonna pick me up so I brought it. But then he couldn't.

ANDREW
What does he have? One of those tandem things?

SAM
No. He drives a Ninja. Goes way faster than this guy.

ANDREW
But what kind of helmet is that?

SAM
You can wear it on a bike. Anyway, how's your head?

ANDREW
I should live through the day.

SAM
Cool. Make a right here.

ANDREW
Are you doing anything right now?

SAM
Can you elaborate on "doing anything"?

ANDREW
I know this guy, Jesse. He bought this mansion that's right up here, and he wants me to come visit him. But I don't want to stay very long. I was thinking, like if you came too, I could just say I have to take you home when I'm ready to go.

SAM
Wow. That's pretty damn random of you, Andrew.

ANDREW
I know.

SAM
"Nice to meet you. Can I use you?"

ANDREW
No.

SAM
It's the Hollywood in you, I guess.

ANDREW
No. Come on. It's not like that. It'll be fun. I'll tell you what, we can have like, like a signal. Like, when you pull on your ear, that's the code. And then I'll be like, "Oh, I got to take her home." And then we'll go.

SAM
Can we have code names too?

ANDREW
If you want.

SAM
Okay. But don't try and like kidnap me or anything, 'cause my step-uncle's a bounty hunter and he could have you tracked and killed.

ANDREW
You're such a liar.

SAM
Whoo!

EXT. JESSE'S MANSION - BACKYARD [Jesse holds a bow and a flaming arrow. He shoots it up in the air at them as Andrew and Sam stand in the middle of the field]

JESSE
Okay. You ready?

[The arrow lands close to both Sam and Andrew. She tugs on her eard - the signal to leave.]

EXT. SAM’S PORCH

ANDREW
I'll be fine. Am I the first boy you've ever brought home?

SAM
No. But, um...I lied to you before when I told you my boyfriend drives a Ninja.

ANDREW
He doesn't drive a bike?

SAM
No, I don't have a boyfriend. But, you know, he might drive a Ninja. Wherever he is.

ANDREW
Wow. We're off to a great start.

SAM
Okay. So, so sometimes I lie. I mean, I'm weird, man. About random stuff too. I don't even know why I do it. It's like, it’s like a tic. I mean, sometimes I hear myself say something, and then I think "Wow, that wasn't even remotely true."

ANDREW
So how do people know what's real?

SAM
Well, I always feel bad afterwards and admit them when they're lies. Can you trust that?

ANDREW
Open the door.

SAM
Okay.

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