The Walking Lag Spike of Gaming lyrics

(Verse)
Marshmello Mobile? More like Marshmello Malfunction, because everything about this dude’s game is lagging—his style, his skills, and his entire existence. If he were a Wi-Fi signal, he’d be stuck on one bar with 500ms ping, dropping every connection to reality. Bro moves like he’s buffering IRL

And that name? Marshmello? What, because you’re soft, squishy, and get roasted on an open flame? Fitting, bеcause your career’s getting torched right now. If clout-chasing was a profеssion, you’d be Employee of the Year. You’re like a bootleg DJ who got lost on the way to a Fortnite event and ended up fumbling through the mobile gaming world instead

(Verse 2)
Let’s talk about your skills—if we can even call them that. Watching you play is like watching a toddler try to use an iPad with mittens on. Your reaction time? Slower than a Windows XP startup. Your decision-making? More questionable than a free VPN from a sketchy website. You aim like you’re playing with a cracked screen, and your movement is stiffer than a 2003 Nokia’s keypad

And don’t even get me started on your content. It’s like you took every trend, put them in a blender, and ended up with a lukewarm, flavorless mess. The only thing drier than your commentary is the tumbleweeds rolling through your live chat. If charisma was a currency, you’d be bankrupt

Two minutes and 38 seconds? I could go all day, but I think you already took enough Ls to last a lifetime