[Intro: Ross as Santa]
Mmm yeah
Ho ho ho
Oh sh*t I got ten minutes
Oh I need to do something with my di*k
Hmm, oh god Tumblr's got some good sh*t on there
Ooh, oh god PornHub's sh*tty
Incest? No thank you
It's Tumblr for me all the way
Always Tumblr
Mmm
[Verse 1]
Looking at some demon di*ks on the web
Some hog tied elves giving unicorns head
Aliens with tits? Why the f*ck not?
I'm a pretty weird guy, you better watch out thots
I've tried all the Twitch streams, they don't get me on
All the normal porn sites just make me soft
I'll be squeezing my hog like a little fumbler
I only get my porn from the blogs at Tumblr
[Hook: Smith, Trott, Ross]
Secret Santa
Clear your browser (yeah)
Secret Santa (good sh*t)
Clear your goddamn browser
[Verse 2: Ross]
The weird sh*t I'm into helps me empty my sack
Cartoon cake farts and furries' crack
Two girls one cup might not do it for you
I've j*rked it to futa and yaoi too
Step-mum, stepson don't do it for me
I can only c*m when it's inter-species
Kink-shame me now and you'll always regret
I once saw a horse get sucked off by a vet
[Hook: Smith, Trott, Ross]
Secret Santa
Clear your browser
Secret santa (yeah)
Clear your f*cking browser (oh yeah)
[Verse 3: Ross, Smith]
All the way
I'm going all the way with this one oh yeah
Oh wait where's it gone?
I can't see it
It's gone it's not on-
Oh it's not on the site anymore
What the f*ck?
(Secret Santa)
What the f*ck where's my f*cking sh*t? I want my f*cking porn
(Clear your browser)
I can't find my f*cking porn on Tumblr
(Secret Santa)
Where did it go? Where's it going that's the best sh*t ever
(Clear your f*cking browser)
I'm gonna f*cking flip a chain or some sh*t
Where's my f*cking porn?
Goddammit
What the f*ck is this sh*t?
What's the f*cking point?
I'm not delivering f*cking presents to kids
f*ck this sh*t
Yeah I'm f*cking-
I'm gonna get f*cking high
Jesus
[Outro: Smith, Trott, Ross]
Okay that's enough
What did you want me to do?
To go back to the bass but it's alright
That's fine, we can just cut as "I wanna get f*cking high"
I'm gonna go get f*cking high this is bullsh*t
It's gone from my favourite f*cking site
I think we nailed it, right?
Yeah I think we got, we got ninety percent of that
I think that was it, that was it, that was good
That was pretty- that was the one, that was the one