Dentist! lyrics

[ORIN]
When I was young and just a bad little kid
My mama noticed funny things I did
Like shootin' puppies with a B B gun
I'd poison guppies, and when I was done
I'd find a pus*y cat and bash its head
That's when my mama said

[Crystal, Ronette, Chiffon]
What did she say?

[Orin]
She said "My boy, I think someday
You'll find a way
To make your natural tendencies pay"

You'll be a dentist
(Be a dentist)
You have a talent for causing things pain
(Pain)
Son, be a dentist
(Son, be a dentist)
People will pay you to be inhumane
(Inhumane)
Your temperament's wrong for the priesthood
And teaching would suit you still less
Son, be a dentist you'll be a success
[Crystal, Ronette, Chiffon]
Here he is folks, the leader of the plaque!
Watch him suck up that gas, oh my God
He is a dentist and he'll never ever be any good
Who wants their teeth done by the Marquis De Sade?

[PATIENT]
Oh, that hurts, wait, I'm not numb

[ORIN]
Ehh, shut up, open wide, here I come
I am your dentist
(Goodness Gracious)
And I enjoy the career that I picked
(Love it)
I am your dentist
(Fitting braces)
And I get off on the pain I inflict
(You really love it)

I thrill when I drill a bicuspid
(Ooh, bicuspid)
It's swell, though they tell me I'm maladjusted
(Dentist)
And though it may cause my patients distress
(Distress)
Somewhere, somewhere in heaven above me
I know, I know that my mama's proud of me
Oh, Mama!
'Cause I'm a dentist, and a success

Say aah!
(Ahh)
Say aah!
(Ahh)
Say ahh!
(Ahh)
Now spit!